When Loyalty Holds Us Back: Exploring Systemic Resistance to Change
- Sini Lindholm
- Apr 28
- 3 min read
A thought-provoking line from J.J. Stam & B. Schreuder's book Systemic Coaching makes you pause: "Resistance to change often has to do with loyalty."
What an insightful statement. We are loyal to something we don’t want to let go of, something we fear losing, or something we may have already lost. This loyalty anchors us to the past and inhibits renewal. Loyalty is part of the invisible dynamics within organizations, often operating unconsciously.
For example, loyalties might manifest as follows:
In integration scenarios, the values and ethos of the acquired company resonate more strongly than those of the new company.
During restructuring negotiations, there may be loyalty toward a manager or leader who was let go.
Following organizational changes, a team may remain loyal to the unit they previously belonged to.
A revealing question during times of change could be:
To what or whom do individuals or teams feel connected?
Do they still identify with the former company, manager, leader, or unit?
Where do they feel they belong—what is their place?
At the core of systemic development lies the question of belonging: Where do I feel I belong? Do I have a place here? In times of change, this new sense of belonging may remain unclear. It’s often assumed that people will automatically adapt to the new organization and begin working productively. But what if they don’t feel aligned with the new organization or unit? What if their role in the new structure is unclear, frustrating, or even intimidating? What if they still feel a strong connection and sense of belonging to the past? In such cases, resistance to change becomes highly likely.
Loyalty often operates unconsciously, driven by a systemic collective conscience striving to preserve the system's integrity. This drive frequently unfolds beneath the surface of awareness.
When faced with resistance to change in your organization, try exploring by asking:
Where do the individual or team feel they belong? Where would they like to belong?
To what or whom do they feel connected?
Where do they perceive their place to be?
What loyalties might be anchoring them to the past?
How could their connection to the new situation be strengthened?
Change begins with acknowledging reality—recognizing the situation and people’s experiences within it. In such situations, individuals have diverse realities; there isn’t a singular truth. Acknowledging reality is the starting point for change. For example:"I sense that your team still feels a strong connection and loyalty to your former leader."
Recognizing reality fosters a sense of being seen. This feeling of being seen is essential for individuals to let go of the past and move forward, embracing renewal. Once reality is acknowledged, the focus should shift to reinforcing the sense of belonging: Where is our place? How can we create an environment where people feel a sense of belonging and that they have a place here?
A sense of belonging is a fundamental human need. It provides a foundation for feeling safe. Without a sense of belonging, people might feel out of place in an organization and experience insecurity. They may not label it as such, but instead, recognize feelings of discomfort, unease, or other distress. At the root of these feelings, however, is the need for security—an inherent sense of incompleteness when belonging is absent.
Key takeaways
Next time you encounter resistance to change, consider these key questions:
Where do individuals or teams feel they belong?
What loyalties might still anchor them to the past?
How can you strengthen their connection to the new situation?
Remember, meaningful change begins with understanding and acknowledging the current reality. By fostering a sense of belonging and addressing unseen dynamics, you create a foundation for trust, renewal, and growth.
Stay curious, compassionate, and committed to building an environment where everyone feels they have a place. Transformation starts with you.
